Eve’s story

Parent story

I spent 6 years fighting to keep my son in education, safe and alive. Most people would assume I was fighting the vile criminals that exploit children, but it wasn’t just them. I had to fight the systems that should be protecting our children.

I witnessed the blaming language and biased comments from professionals. My son was viewed as a criminal and not seen as a child let alone a victim in need of protection and support. This was all whilst I was desperately trying to fight off the exploiters.

My son being exploited had completely consumed my life, leaving me feeling frustrated, unheard and lonely. My son had witnessed things no child should witness.

Whilst searching online for support for my son I came across Ivison Trust. I arranged a phone call, and I joined the parent participation group. We met online- I felt safe speaking out and I was interested to hear from everyone else. Sadly, my story wasn’t unique; many of the parents had similar stories. I couldn’t stop thinking about all the children affected and the never-ending costs to children, families and society. I realised we are not doing enough -the reality is that criminal gangs are constantly evolving and using new tactics to trap & exploit our children. I felt a strong sense to share my experience and make a difference.

As a group we decided we wanted to share our stories with professionals working with children in the hope that it would bring about positive change, ultimately, feeding through to help parents and the children.  Over a few months we worked with Ivison Trust putting together a training package.

My son’s exploitation had really taken its toll on me. I had lost all my confidence and I had never done any public speaking. I had mixed feelings of being excited and terrified.  I kept thinking about everything I had been through and concluded parent led training should be a walk in the park!

I’ve travelled to venues in different parts of the country from my home and it’s been reassuring that I would not know any of the professionals. I really wanted to be anonymous and I wasn’t ready to see any familiar faces from my home area.  It was lovely to meet the other parents and Ivison staff in person. We formed our groups and set up in our breakout rooms.  I was really nervous. I took a deep breath and told myself, at the end of the day I’m just a mum telling my story there is no right or wrong – just the truth.  The audience was a mix of Teachers, Police, social workers and Youth Workers and I delivered my training regarding my frustrations and the missed opportunities by police and education. I felt that it was really well received and the professionals were very respectful. They seemed genuine and interested in what I had to say. I really enjoyed listening to them discussing my story and how they would implement new practises. I met some amazing professionals that really care, want to learn and make a difference. I was left feeling so empowered; not only had I managed to become a lived experience speaker, I felt everyone had listed to me and really valued what I had to say.

For me personally I have found joining Ivison trust parent participation hugely beneficial because I have people around me now that have a true understanding of child exploitation and that has given me back my confidence and faith that by working together, we can build a strong line of defence against child exploitation.