Remember your power – a parent’s tips for coping with services

Remember your power
– a parent’s tips for coping with services

When dealing with all the agencies it’s easy to think you have no power, but you can hold on to the fact you are the professional when it comes to your child.

Remember the relationship, the bond and the influence you have established with your child long before the abuse started. Remind the professionals involved with your family about the importance and power in your connection to your child. Try and hold on to your relationship and be there 24/7 no matter how hard that may become.

Sometimes at the time you can’t see the difference you’re making, when your child is so angry with you. For instance, our daughter passed her GCSEs only because of our persistence and determination to support her and get her into school on exam days. It wasn’t easy- she resisted and hated us at the time. Five years down the line and after more bumps in the road she’s thankful and doing well at university.

Don’t be afraid to challenge the professionals.

It can feel that you’re getting nowhere but you can share your concerns through complaints and escalate everything, but do it in writing. You can go all the way to your MP. Remember not to personalise difficulties, you are the voice for your child, don’t be excluded; we had a social worker changed because of inadequate performance and poor attitude. I know it can be traumatic for us parents, and it’s easy to be pushed around when you’re exhausted. I want you to remember your power.

Don’t ever give up and seek support wherever you can find it. The telephone support and network days from Ivison Trust really helped us and afforded us strength when we thought we had nowhere to go. Use the support that is there for you.